Finding Sanctuary for Yourself
The journey of finding sanctuary begins with you. I mean that literally.
What is different about approaching our spaces as sanctuaries, rather than just seeing them as rooms or a house? It comes down to two things: you and love.
I was working with a beloved writing and messaging coach when I came up with this statement: sanctuary is the embodiment of love in our environments.
When I said it aloud, it gave us both pause and me a good case of goosebumps. That’s a sign for me — goosebumps indicate truth.
When I was young, I remember being taught that we should not become attached to objects or things. Material possessions can become “false idols” when we attach too much importance to them. That’s not really what we’re talking about here, though.
I do love physical objects. I make my living as an interior designer, among other things — how could I not love physical objects—at least the beautiful ones? But in this case I’m talking about a different understanding of love and objects and places.
Let me explain what I mean. We know that everything in our universe is made up of energy. Advancements in science have proven this to be true. We, as part of the universe, are also made up of energy. And when we invest our energy (think intention, focus and caring) into our environments and the objects they contain, something magical happens: that energy is returned to us.
Put very simply, when we love on our spaces and the things they contain, they love us back.
But wait. Is that even possible?
I assure you it is not only possible, I experience it each and every day. You can too, if this sounds like something you would like to try. Maybe you already do and you know exactly what I’m talking about.
I have laughingly referred to myself as the house whisperer. Yes we’ve all heard of dog whisperers and horse whisperers — but a house whisperer? That might sound odd but yes, I really am. When I walk into my home or my design studio, the energy there is immediately positive and familiar to me. It should be — it’s MY energy. I live and work in those spaces. I greet them, I clean them, I notice them, I love on them. My personal energy is imprinted on them.
I talk to them — not always out loud (lest my team and/or family think I’ve gone crazy), but I do communicate with my spaces. I express my appreciation with compliments and loving gestures. I pluck dead leaves off my plants. I pick up a furry dust bunny of dog hair to throw away. I trail my fingers lovingly across the slab of black walnut that is my desk. I pause to notice the dappled sunlight filtering through the trees in my backyard and allow my heart to swell with delight. I whisper things like, “hello house,” and “goodnight office.” I commune with my spaces and the things they contain in this way. I fluff pillows and wash out the sink. I pick up my crystals and hold them in my hand. I sink gratefully into the soft pillows on my bed. I thank them by feeling filled with appreciation for what is around me.
Do you see the difference I was referring to in the beginning of this post? I approach my spaces as sacred and beloved. They, in turn, reflect back energy to me that is sacred and beloved. One of my university professors told me something profound that stopped me in my tracks. He said, “Everything that is, lives — animate, ensouled and symbolic.”
Ensouled.
What a delicious word. Goosebumps again. Viewing my world as one that is ensouled has revealed truths about sanctuary and why it works to make our lives better so beautifully and perfectly.
When we take the spaces around us for granted and we don’t actually see them or invest ourselves in them, it’s a bit like taking a much-needed soak in the bath but only perching on the rim of the tub. We have to immerse ourselves in the water to experience the benefits.
And there are many benefits to living and working in a nurturing environment! We are able to recover more quickly from ill-health and difficult times — resilience. We are able to relax and rejuvenate so that we can come back out into the world feeling loved, grounded and appreciated. We are able to experience mindfulness in a way that positively affects every conversation, every relationship and every interaction. We are able to engender our own wellness in every way — physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.
This might sound idealistic and perhaps too much to expect from a space, but it works. I am living it. Sanctuary may well be the panacea for our times. We all need refuge and healing. We can all create sanctuary for ourselves and for the people we love. It doesn’t have to be a picture-perfect space that could be featured in a magazine. It only has to have us, setting the space up so it serves us and then using the space and loving on it. That is what creates the essence of a sanctuary and why it’s different from just another place. Yes, there are design principles, colors and my own special sauce that I like to use, but finding sanctuary comes down to embodying love in our environments.
We’ve all been somewhere in our lives that we have loved — to a space that reached us and pleased us on a deep level. Maybe it was a grandparent’s house or a vacation cabin. Maybe it was our bedroom growing up or another space altogether. We didn’t know why we loved it, only that we adored being there. The reason was that it was full of love — maybe even overflowing with it.
What do you think? Can you see your world as ensouled? Are you ready to get off the rim of the tub and sink into the hot water? More importantly, are you ready to stop residing at your house, and ready to start living there?
With love and gratitude,
Lisa